Author: switchfun

lavenderbutts:

This is what it means to be a little fucktoy for me, boy.

Your wrists taped to the wall and your ankles too, unable to move, wearing only a flimsy shirt, ripped because I was impatient, a needy, hazy look on your face, waiting.

And then me, I’ll come to you when I need to use you, I’ll gently caress your body, my eyes hungry for you, I’ll bite your neck, your chest, your thighs, marking you as my property and then I’ll wrap one leg around your waist, teasing you, rubbing myself against you until you let out a delicious, desperate sound and then I’ll turn around and fuck you, slow, evil, making you gasp and drool and cry for more.

And when I’m done with you and have taken my pleasure, I’ll leave you there, just like that. Needy, hard, shaking. My little fucktoy.

Source: fantasmes-et-perversions-erochic

usethepleasureboy:

“Tell me you’re mine,” she whispers as she undoes his belt, yanking his pants down. “Say it.” She pulls his shirt off feverishly and runs her hands along his naked torso. Her nails dig into his skin, and he lets out a gasp.

I…I’m yours…all yours.

She shoves him onto her bed and mounts him. She pushes down, sinking his hard cock into her hot dripping gash. 

“Mine. Don’t you dare forget it.”

Source: casa-dos-meninos

organized-studies:

kindnessandgoodvibrations:

kindnessandgoodvibrations:

ghostoftwentysomethingspresent:

madsciences:

awfullydull:

markrial:

tramampoline:

slow-riot:

Weirdly anti-millennial articles have scraped the bottom of the barrel so hard that they are now two feet down into the topsoil

its so wild like “this generation with no fucking money is learning to prioritize essentials” and all these chucklefucks can write is advertisements for these companies

at least our jeans won’t tear at the seams after two washes

FUCK FABRIC SOFTENER IT’S UTTERLY POINTLESS

AND FUCK DRYER SHEETS LITERALLY NOBODY EVER HAS ENOUGH OF A PROBLEM WITH STATIC TO WARRANT PAYING OUT THE ASS FOR THAT SHIT

DO YOU WANT CLEAN CLOTHES? YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO BUY FUCKING DETERGENT JUST MAKE YOUR OWN* IT’S SO GODDAMN EASY AND 80X CHEAPER

FUCK THE ENTIRE LAUNDRY INDUSTRY

*Fuck The Entire Laundry Industry Recipe

1 cup Washing Soda (not Baking Soda. Different things.)

1 cup Borax (not Boric Acid. Also a different thing.)

½ cup – 1 cup grated bar soap (you can use literally anything. I often use Ivory because it’s easy to get and I find it works well, a lot of people like Fels-Naptha, which is an actual laundry bar. Some people use Dr. Bronner’s. Really does not fucking matter.)

After grating your soap, combine all ingredients. That’s it. That’s the whole thing. Use maybe a ¼ cup per load.

^^^ I’ve done this for years now and it works as well as any store bought detergent

WHAT
Thank you, tumblr user awfullydull! Your URL does no justice to the good advice you give!

Also you can MAKE your own washing soda very VERY cheaply.

Step one: acquire $5 bag of baking soda from Costco.

Step two: lay that motherfucking baking soda out on a baking tray.

Step three: bake the baking soda on a tray in an oven at 400° for 1 hour (to make the moisture evaporate, leaving washing soda)

Step four: revel in how easy and cheap it is to make your own washing soda, and maybe take a moment to be angry that the industry upcharges the fuck out of something that is so easy to make.

I see some of y’all complaining about static and/or wanting nice smelling laundry. Go to a craft store, find 100% wool yarn balls. If it doesn’t come in a ball, ask an employee to make it into a tight ball for you. Wash in the washing machine to make it felted. Remove from washer, add a few drops of essential oil to the ball, allow to seep in. Dry with clothing. Doesn’t need to be rewashed ever, and if it stops smelling, add few more drops of essential oil. Bam, reusable dryer sheets.

I love this post so much it’s filled with helpful advice, hatred, saving money, and fucking the system all in one

Source: slow-riot